What do I teach my children about the Lunar New Year’s “lucky money”?
My childhood memories during Tết (Lunar New Year)’s days always have bright images of the red packets of lucky money. Now, as an adult who no longer receives red packets from other adults, I am still eager to prepare the newly printed cash and carefully put them in red packets to give them to my loved ones and wish them the best luck.
Nonetheless, ever since becoming the mother of a baby girl, each red envelope has gotten a total new meaning. We teach our child the lessons on how to live fully with gratitude, make every effort count and appreciate only the good traditional values.
Through the lucky money, I teach my children how to love and care about others.
Every Vietnamese child wants to receive a good fortune of lucky money on Lunar New Year, mainly because this “money” represents love and good luck. On Lunar New Year’s Day, I make sure that I have thoroughly explained to my daughter the origin of lucky money so that she would understand that its true value is not in the number printed on the bill, but in the way that the people give the money to her. Therefore, I also only give out the lucky money to wish my child, nieces and nephews as a pure “symbol” for good luck in the new year.
I hope you understand that as an Asian, no matter where you live, you should treasure and deeply understand your culture and ethnicity so that you can love and preserve them better. Through the red envelopes on the days of Tết (Lunar New Year), I have learned how to be kind and polite, how to give, how to bow, how to say thank you, and the other things that if without the “lucky money” tradition I probably would not have known without someone to guide me.
Asians highly value gentle and considerable behaviour. I show my daughter how to leave a good and adorable impression in the hearts of others so that they can remember her more, of course in a good way. It is also an advantage for her to be more easily adored by people in the future. If you want to be loved, you need to learn how to show your sincere gratitude and respect with the smallest things such as the thanks, the slight bows, the polite goodbyes and know how to use two hands to receive or give a gift, etc. That way, everyone will see that the child is very well-educated, and of course adults always like well-behaved children!
In addition, because both of my husband and I always teach our girl the good behaviour she should have even from the smallest things, the other people love to call her cute and adorable. Only us – the parents will often laugh whenever someone compliments this little girl, and will then joke about how they should not have judged a book by its cover. When only being around her parents, our daughter can be very active and mischievous! And back to the story of lucky money, although this culture is different from the West, it is still a part of my own culture, so my daughter is very invested and eagerly wants to learn more about the meanings of every Vietnamese tradition. I also take advantage of every opportunity, even the smallest, to inspire my children about Vietnamese customs, practices, culture, etc., just like how back in the old days my mother also did the same thing to me and my siblings.
Lucky money is just pure luck, while true effort is the only thing that leads to success.
Recently, I heard people talking about red envelopes being a burden for many adults, and I find this somehow makes sense. If everyone has been doing well financial-wise, lucky money is not a big expense; but in the recent years, there has been a pandemic that has led to economic recession and businesses has become fairly difficult, but those people also have to worry about preparing money for Lunar New Year shopping and red envelopes to give to all the old and young, big and small in the house, and it would easily become a pressure.
I often teach my child to work for herself and to spend money on things on her own. Children can easily earn money from doing well in school and receiving the money as a reward or from helping with housework, and sometimes they do not even need to rely on lucky money as their only source of “income”. Although lucky money is a nice custom that goes with good intentions, I do not want my child to rely on it too much as a source for spending or accumulating. I still give lucky money to my child and still let them receive lucky money from others, but she should only receive it from close relatives and acquaintances and the amount of money should be limited. I also understand that the true and only meaning of lucky money is to wish each other a good start to the new year. If you want to achieve something higher, you have to work on it yourself.
I also often take my daughter to charity trips so that she can learn how to give things in a more suitable way. “Things being given is not as important as the way you give them”. For instance, you have to raise both hands when giving money to beggars and homeless people so that it shows respect both for them and for yourself. I want to let my daughter understand that you should treat people the way you want to be treated.
On Tết (Lunar New Year)’s Day, I still prepare money in red envelopes and go to the temple and go around the city to give to the poor. I still remember the first time I brought my daughter to do this thing on New Year’s Day, she asked me, “Why do we have to put money in red envelopes, mom?” I took this great opportunity to teach her how to give and receive in the most considerate way. Even if I give people a very little amount of money, I still put it in an envelope to show my respect and consideration to them.
Lessons on how to treat people and how to live lovingly and kindly are still incorporated into my stories and actions every day, but on the occasion of Lunar New Year, it somehow becomes even more meaningful. I have learned more about Vietnamese culture and heard, seen, and done it year after year. Gradually, Asian culture will take root in you into a flow that is inherited through generations.
Expatriates’ Tết (Lunar New Year) is the chance to preserve and pass on cultural traditions to the next generations.
The most desirable thing about being a child living far from home like me is that whenever we do our best for something, we will be really eager to find ways to achieve it. The happiest thing for me is that whenever New Year comes, I will have an opportunity to show what Asian culture and Vietnamese culture are like. The joy of Tết (Lunar New Year) is also when I see my children happy because they are learning new things, seeing them eager to do what I tell them and listening attentively to stories, has become the “spiritual specialty” of our family.
On ordinary days, although I have practised well, it must be on the occasion of the traditional New Year, when the traditional culture is more obvious that I will learn to understand it quickly and remember it longer. The national culture is also preserved through the generations even though we do not live in the homeland.
Lucky money is an indispensable part of the story of the coming New Year and the coming Spring. Red envelopes bring wishes for a peaceful, healthy and lucky New Year. Now, lucky money is also a way for me to convey stories about Asian’s cultural traditions for children to understand and love Vietnam more. And most importantly, I want to send the message that a person’s attitude will be the only thing that determines their success. You will always live well if you have a right and positive attitude to all things around you!
Much love,
Truly Inspired.
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