INNER STRENGTH AND THE “STONES”

Lately, it feels a little unusual for me that I am having a big urge to share the journey where I build my inner strength with everyone. Perhaps this is one of the signals that the universe wants to remind me of during the time I am developing myself alongside my Truly Inspired team.

To be as stable as I am today, I have experienced so many different things, from many complicated scenarios to tiny bits of emotions. There are many stories I want to share with you, yet it is truly difficult to talk about such a long, complicated journey in such a short article like this. While still hesitating, thinking about which would be a suitable story to write about, during the last Lunar New Year, I had the opportunity to visit The Great Stupa of Universal Compassion in Bendigo, Victoria, Australia – where the largest monolithic Buddha statue in the world is located.

On the way there, I scrolled through some social media posts and coincidentally came across a saying of a great Zen Master: “A fistful of salt has never been too salty when being dissolved into a whole river.” I smiled as I immediately saw the image of myself in this quote because I knew I have lived my life this way for the past ten years.

When visiting the temple, what I noticed the most was the stone wall with a variety of stones in all shapes, sharpness, polished, and different sizes… overlapping each other, creating a very stable wall. steady. As soon as I saw the wall, the idea of every stone in distinct shapes and sizes representing the wounds and life lessons that we experienced on the journey of growing up popped up in my mind. Like a predestination that showed up at the right time, when the stone wall appeared along with the sentence I heard on the way, I suddenly smiled and recalled questions that I used to often get from friends, relatives, and even those who I had the opportunity to contact, who came to me when finding themselves in certain dilemmas.

Moreover, this stone wall is also part of the answer to the questions that those dear friends and acquaintances of mine have posed for me: “How can you feel so calm when being in the middle of a storm? If it was them, they would have already collapsed!”

I consider the events, objects, and pain to be those stones that you can imagine being on that wall. After each life lesson, after each time I get knocked down by tragedies, I have chosen to pick up those stones full of pain, tears, and misery to observe and truly feel them just like how I would feel each stone on the wall you are seeing in the following image.

Do you know, only when your endocentric is fulfilled or stable, that is only when we can truly consequently take things lightly, then overcome them more easily?

All the misery and loss are an invisible state of emotion where sometimes. because it is so painful when being so deeply immersed in that emotion, we can not recognize it. Let’s turn those invisible into “visible” emotions. We must recognize where the pain is coming from and why is it so agonizing to be in such a state. Identify the rights/wrongs in whatever we are facing to understand where our problems are. Consequently, we will know what can be our next step.

Do you wonder why there are still so many people struggling to overcome all the “mad hurricanes” in their lives?

It is because they did not stand still, even for a minute to identify important problems in the most painful time, but instead chose to run away. However, for me, I will want to feel how painful the problems are, to identify why it hurts so bad, what causes these miseries, and how many times has this been repeated. From there, I will know how to solve the mental issue and move on.

Furthermore, do you know that when we dare to face the pain and straightforwardly accept it, this means that we are already successfully starting to build inner strength within ourselves?

I am always grateful for every “hurricane” or damage that this life intentionally or unintentionally gives me. It helps me realize many valuable life lessons as well as interesting experiences. After experiencing those “stones” in different shapes and sizes, I have always unconsciously treasured and packed them as memories and kept them in my heart. Those “stones”, day by day, have built a solid and stable wall deep inside of me.

When our inner endocentric wall is strong enough, we can reduce the instability in us, at the same time calm ourselves down as soon as there are any problems in life.

I am very grateful that I had the chance to meet a wise Master, who led me to the path of cultivation 10 years ago. On that path, I have learned about mindfulness and awakening inside people. Moreover, later on, I also had more chances to meet many other Masters.

Furthermore, I am also extremely grateful to the good/villain messengers, all of them, along with every event that took place during that time, have helped to strengthen my inner self even more. Hence now, me being like this today is the result of those valuable experiences from my hard past, you see?

I am grateful for those “bullets and arrows” as they give me interesting experiences in my life. They made me stronger, more valuable, and more stable after every step of my life journey.

Okay, now have you already been able to imagine how you would build your inner strength?

The only way you can do this is through daring to recognize and turn the invisible pain into visible so that you will truly feel it – that is the main material in finding a solution to overcome that pain.

You should remember, the inner endocentric strength is not built in just a day or two, but is the whole process of you “enjoying” the pain. Thus, depending on each person’s luck, we will have the opportunity to experience different large or small “stones” in life. Through the journey of experience, our inner strength will be cultivated to become more stable and secured.

Writing about this reminds me of a quote from my Master who used to teach me many years ago: “The mind must be in peace to be concentrated.” This quote has followed me throughout the whole process of building my inner strength as well as the journey of improving myself. Understanding my inner strength truly gives me lots of valuable things, because through that, I understand the paths that I will and must follow in the future even better than before. 

I believe anyone can do this and can even do it much better than me! You only need to DARE TO BE COMMITTED once. Remember, everyone has the right to build a solid “inner wall” for themselves, and you are not an exception.

Let me tell you another small story.

During this one time when I was cooking, my daughter came to me and said: “You always taught me to respect the adults in the family and the surroundings, but why do some people sometimes take advantage of me when you are not around to teach me many wrong things, force me to spread bad information about you, being so disrespectful towards you like that?” I told her I knew that. She was so surprised, “Why do you continue to teach me to pay respect to them when you already know that?” My daughter asked this question with a rather “irritated” attitude as she wondered why she should be nice to someone who was not even treating her well. Being a “step-mother”, I felt both extremely happy and funny because of the way that she was trying to protect me.

I explained to her that it is normal for other people to love, to hate, or to even be jealous, but the only important thing is that we understand what we are doing and live as kindly as we can. Living like that will not leave us with any regrets later. As for what other people think and feel about us, it is clear that we can not control it. All we can do and need to do is to finish our duties to the best of our ability.

If it was me more than 10 years ago, when someone caused trouble or intentionally talked badly behind my back, I would straightforwardly sort everything out in black and white. However, right now, after understanding what “being awakened” is, I do not want to do that anymore. Conversely, I now understand how to put myself in the position of others to understand that it is hard for everyone to avoid thinking “A stepmother can never treat her husband’s son well.” Yet, if someone has been “awakened”, then instead of asking questions to know what “bad things about themselves” are being spread around from their children, they will silently observe what they are doing, and how they love their children or vice versa, before intentionally targeting themselves like that. I hope with that, I have also helped my daughter to “discover” the new clear distinction between the rights and wrongs in life.

Do you see that? It is “mindfulness” that has given me a more complete view from my perspective and others too. Consequently, I do not have to “stand up” to defend my fairness when someone is targeting me because my inner strength has helped me to stand still, even though the “spears” are strongly rushing and being targeted towards me.

Unsatisfactory events will always happen every day, every hour with anyone you meet, whether it is a stranger or a loved one. They can make you feel miserable when you cannot fully accept them. You would often have a feeling of wanting to avoid or eliminate those unpleasant elements, but not dare to face them to understand what the core problem is.

Fortunately, there are always people who can handle the pain and the unpleasantness very gently as they have built a strong endocentric, stable inner strength so that their heart would become bigger day by day. This will help us to accept the damages or mistakes that our loved ones, relatives, or strangers have brought up in our life.

At this time, the noble Master’s words are being resounded in my mind: “A fistful of salt has never been too salty when being dissolved into a whole river.” I love you, my friend, and I truly believe you can do it too!

Much love,

Truly Inspired