MOVING ON

In the past, I often wondered about questions like these:

• Why do some people easily overcome challenges or shocks while others take a long time to move on?
• Why do some people cry buckets when faced with separation, but later on, or even much later, they find laughter, joy and seem to forget the past completely?

I have two typical examples for these cases:
Firstly, someone who has just experienced a deep breakup or unexpectedly lost someone from their life. Secondly, someone leaving a class or an organisation they have been closely connected to for many years.

During my school years, I used to hear upperclassmen saying that during graduation ceremonies or farewells, if someone cried and showed intense emotions, they are the ones who were most likely to quickly forget the old memories and blend in new environments fast. I used to doubt that and think emotionally expressive people would carry those emotions for a long time, unable to just simply move on.

However, witnessing these situations myself, I have understood the true meaning of the upperclassmen’s words. I realised that people rich in emotions, and full of love, often display intense emotions (sometimes overwhelming feelings), especially during separations. Yet, afterward, they tend to quickly find happiness and emotional stability. Some even seem to have “forgotten” the past and seamlessly integrate into new environments because they have truly MOVED ON.

They cried. They released all their regrets and fond memories during or after the separation and still hold onto those memories. Nevertheless, eventually, they stopped crying, and all emotions subsided. This marks the moment they have completely detached from those emotions and memories. While they will still remember some important events, they will not focus on them intensely anymore. This allows them to embrace new beginnings in a different environment.

Similarly, in the context of a relationship breakup, you might encounter people like this at least once in your life: They leave a relationship with profound emotional scars, experiencing mental damage that leads to tears and deep sorrow. The world seems to crumble, and hope appears lost for them. However, after about six months or a year, they transform into entirely different individuals, radiating genuine happiness. Some might even have new relationships and lives that contrast sharply with their state a few months earlier.

This change occurs because they have MOVED ON.

During their darkest moments, they confronted their pain and allowed themselves to sink into the suffering just like exposing each wound to saltwater so that it could cleanse them, causing temporary discomfort but ultimately aiding in the healing process. They gave themselves the chance to release their emotions, acknowledging the longing and devastation. Yet, when everything collapsed, they experienced a “rebirth.” Rising stronger and full of vitality, they left behind the negativity and unease, ready to live a new life.

On the other hand, those who can not easily cry, who shed fewer tears, or who can not cry after a separation tend to be the ones who forget the least. They do not let emotions run wild, but those feelings often pop up in their mind multiple times throughout their lives. Some memories and regrets remain with them until their last breaths. Such individuals are not emotionless, they do have feelings. However, it is because they have not moved on, and have not let go as they bury these emotions beneath a layer of ego or self-encouragement. As a result, they don’t display those emotions openly, not even to themselves. Ultimately, they end up holding onto more memories and regrets, as they have not genuinely MOVED ON. Of course, some mature early in terms of their personality, who would quietly, deeply, and gently step through challenges in life. Nevertheless, in this article, I would only focus on the emotions of those who struggle to leave the past behind.

My dear friend,

For every mental shock, significant emotional loss in surrounding relationships, and anything related to our soul, we can only truly conclude it all when we allow ourselves to MOVE ON.

We will always remain stuck and carry the burdens of past traumas for a very long time unless we genuinely let ourselves at least once immerse in the pain, the discomfort piercing our hearts. Trust that deep within us, we are always strong and brave. It is just that overwhelming fear has overshadowed everything, making you feel isolated and fearful of being alone. However, my dear friend, every one of us when embarking on our journey through life, will always lead to beautiful results if we try our best and bravely MOVE ON.

You admire those who can be calm and gentle even when the world outside is harsh, do you not?
You also admire those who can endure loneliness and still find happiness in their unique way, do you not?
Those are the strongest individuals and you can become one, too. Just allow yourself to truly MOVE ON when encountering any event, any circumstance, my dear friend.

When you want to cry, just cry. When you are sad, let yourself feel sad. When it hurts, let it hurt you. That is because one day, you will stop crying, the sadness will fade, and the pain will vanish! Always believe that, my dear friend!

Much love,
Truly Inspired