TEARS OF REGRET

In your life, have you ever shed tears of regret? Regret for not doing something for yourself in the past, or regret for failing to do something for someone else?

I believe, most likely you have, haven’t you? Perhaps even many times, in fact.

The reason why I am asking such a question like this today is because I have just heard a deeply moving confession marked by tears of regret from a young woman who has recently graduated from university. She has also just lost her beloved father.

Her father passed away at a relatively young age due to cancer, only three months after being diagnosed… One morning, while she was still in bed, the young girl was abruptly awakened by her mother’s distressed cries and the hurried footsteps of their neighbours in their home.

She quickly woke up and rushed downstairs to find some of her neighbours supporting her father, and in the distance, the wailing sirens of an ambulance. It turned out that when her mother returned from the early morning market, she found her father suddenly experiencing intense chest pain and gradually losing consciousness. In her panic, her mother frantically called the neighbours for help, and they promptly called for an ambulance to ensure her father received immediate medical attention.

Upon learning about her father’s condition, she was utterly devastated and overwhelmed. Her father had always been the family’s pillar of support, the primary breadwinner, and had been working tirelessly to provide for her and her siblings’ education, yet unbeknownst to the girl, he had been battling this illness all along…

Until the last three months of his life, the daughter finally got to know that for over a year, driven by the necessity of survival and in the face of economic hardship due to the pandemic, her father never declined any work opportunity. His sole purpose was to earn enough to support the family and ensure that all of his three daughters could continue their education, even if it meant enduring silent suffering and pain for him. Throughout this past year, he had to undergo physical torment, suffering to the extent that he could hardly eat or drink much, yet he still persisted in going to work every day. His job as a construction worker demanded heavy lifting every single day. He lacked proper nutrition and did not consume any immune-boosting foods or supplements, and consequently, his health horribly deteriorated day by day. He grew painfully thin, but the young girl remained oblivious to the changes in her father…

Finally, the inevitable happened. The hospital discharged her father and advised the family to provide careful care for him. However, in his last days, even drinking a sip of milk was a formidable challenge. Some days, he could only manage to swallow a few spoonfuls of milk. Following these meagre meals, he continued to endure excruciating pain in his abdomen and throat, at times in such agony that he lacked the strength to even move his limbs…

She recounted that every evening after coming home from work, she would enter her father’s room and see a person whose once large and tall frame had now diminished to a mere shadow, lying in the middle of a wide and long 1.8-metre bed. The image of the golden rays of the late afternoon sun streaming through the door crack, casting a warm glow on her father’s bed, etched itself into her memory. It seemed as if it wanted to remind her of the carefree days when she had not spent much time with her father, not understanding the sacrifices he had made for her and her siblings. Waves of memories rushed in with each recounted story, blending with the choked sobs in her voice as she shared the story with me…

My dear friend, I do not know if the story I just shared has moved you or not. I also do not know how many of our Truly Inspired readers have experienced circumstances similar to the young girl in the story above. However, perhaps, anyone among us who has felt the weight of that profound regret has surely experienced great pain and remorse for not doing enough for a loved one before they departed from this life forever, wouldn’t you agree?

When writing this article, I truly had some hesitation. That is because I was concerned about the sombre tone of the emotions that both those involved and the readers of this piece would perceive. However, after some contemplation, I have decided to share this story with you because I wish to convey a message to remind us all: Live in the present moment more, love and care for those around you more, for we will never truly know when it might be the last time we can be with them!

A train departs with whispered grace,
A plane ascends to boundless space,
A fleeting kiss, the wind’s embrace,
In warm farewells, our hearts in chase,
In parting moments, love we trace,
…
All of these will become memories of the past, and it could also be the last moment we get to see them in the present. No one knows what will happen next!

As I was in the midst of composing this article, it coincided with a moment when my sibling in Vietnam was messaging me to share information about a major fire in a large city in the northern part of our homeland. A significant blaze has occurred in a small flat building, resulting in the loss of many lives and severe injuries. Among the victims of this fire were newly arrived university students who had rented accommodations in the city, filled with beautiful hopes and dreams as they prepared to embark on a new academic year; there were also those who had recently called their parents to proudly announce their engagement, planning to hold a wedding by the end of the year, and there was a mother who just the previous night heard her child’s joyful voice over the phone, only to awaken the next morning to the heartbreaking news of their passing…

My dear friend,
Life is inherently unpredictable like that!
Every time a parting occurs, we all carry within us our own regrets and remorse about things left undone. However, after a while, everything fades, and we find ourselves caught up again, forgetting the old sorrows, only to begin the cycle of regret and remorse anew with different people.
We can never predict or know for certain what tomorrow holds for us or our loved ones. Hence, it is better to not let the tears of belated regret roll down your cheeks any longer. Instead, let the contented smiles and cherished memories linger within us whenever we think of someone or something from the past.

Self-love or love for others both require very much effort and dedication, no matter how small they can be, my dear friend!

Much love,
Truly Inspired